If you’ve ever tried to “get rid of” anxiety, you know how exhausting it can be. The harder you fight anxious thoughts, the louder they seem to get. Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) offers a different perspective: control isn’t the solution—it’s often the problem.
Why We Try to Control Anxiety
It’s natural to want relief. Anxiety feels uncomfortable, and our minds tell us, “If I can just stop these thoughts, I’ll feel better.” So we try strategies like:
- Avoiding situations that trigger anxiety
- Distracting ourselves
- Reassuring ourselves repeatedly
These work for a moment—but then the anxiety returns, often stronger. Why? Because control creates a cycle of struggle.
The ACT Perspective
ACT teaches that thoughts and feelings are part of being human. They’re not dangerous, even when they feel intense. When we fight them, we give them more power. Instead of asking, “How do I get rid of this?” ACT invites us to ask:
“Is what I’m doing workable? Does it move me toward the life I want?”
What Happens When We Stop Fighting
When we stop trying to control anxiety, we create space for something new: flexibility. This doesn’t mean liking anxiety—it means allowing it to be there while we take steps toward what matters most.
A Quick ACT Exercise: Notice and Name
Next time anxiety shows up:
- Pause and notice: “I’m having the thought that I can’t handle this.”
- Name it: “That’s a thought, not a fact.”
- Redirect: Ask, “What’s one small thing I can do right now that matters to me?”
This simple shift moves you from struggle to choice.
Final Thoughts
Control feels like the answer, but it often keeps us stuck. ACT offers a path toward freedom—not by eliminating anxiety, but by changing our relationship with it. If you’re curious about learning more, check out Association for Contextual Behavioral Science .
