Sometimes the hardest part of a stressful stretch isn’t the stress itself, it’s the after. I often hear clients describe a strange, hazy distance once the dust settles: “I feel far away… like my brain is wrapped in cotton.”
If this sounds familiar after travel, caregiving, a housing scramble, or a heavy work sprint, you’re not alone. This experience is common, and it has a very real biological explanation.
What’s Happening in Your Body (and Brain)?
Your stress system was in “go mode.” When life demands urgent action, your nervous system shifts into a survival state, releasing stress hormones (adrenaline, cortisol) that heighten alertness and mobilize energy. That’s adaptive short‑term. But when it runs hot for days or weeks, it creates what researchers call allostatic load, the cumulative “wear and tear” of chronic stress on body and brain.
When the storm passes, the downshift can feel foggy. As arousal finally drops, the prefrontal cortex (your “thinking/planful” brain) is temporarily less efficient, working memory and focus dip, and it’s harder to “land” on tasks. That’s why work can feel far away or “cottony” after a crisis. (This PFC slowdown under stress and recovery is well‑described in neuroscience.) [frontiersin.org]
This fog is protective, not pathological. Many people experience a mild, everyday version of dissociation, brief disconnection or “distance”, after intense strain. In the literature, dissociation spans a continuum from totally normal (e.g., zoning out briefly) to clinical. In the post‑stress “come‑down,” a light, protective disconnection can give your system space to recalibrate.
Bottom line: You’re not “losing it.” Your biology is easing out of high alert and rebooting.
Why It Feels Like “Far Away, Like Cotton”
- Allostatic load taxes multiple systems; once demands ease, your brain re‑allocates resources and you feel temporarily unfocused or spacey. [medicalnewstoday.com], [jstor.org]
- Executive functions (attention, planning) are particularly sensitive to stress exposure; they need rest and predictability to come back online. [frontiersin.org]
- It shows up when you’re finally safe. The body often “crashes” after the crisis, when it trusts it can. [health.harvard.edu]
Gentle Ways to Reset
- Give yourself a true rest window
A period of genuine safety and rest helps your system rebalance from sympathetic “go” toward parasympathetic recovery. Emerging work describes “deep rest” states, conditions of safety + restoration that rejuvenate body and brain beyond routine relaxation. [psychiatry.ucsf.edu] - Start tiny: one routine at a time
Pick a single anchor (consistent bedtime, 10‑minute walk, a simple breakfast). Predictable rhythms lower allostatic load over time. [medicalnewstoday.com] - Use grounding to come back to the present
- Try the 5‑4‑3‑2‑1 sensory scan to orient to “right now.” [positiveps…hology.com]
- A quick progressive muscle relax & release can reduce tension and anxiety before sessions or meetings. [counsellin…ection.com]
- ACT‑informed “drop anchor” (feel your feet, slow your breath, notice 5 things) helps when thoughts are stormy.
- Breathe with a longer exhale (2–3 minutes)
Longer exhalations increase vagal activity and can reduce state anxiety in the moment. Try 4 counts in, 6–8 counts out, for 2–5 minutes. [nature.com] - Normalize, then re‑engage slowly
If work feels far away like cotton, that’s a signal to titrate back in. Choose one tiny task (reply to one email, set tomorrow’s agenda) rather than forcing full capacity immediately. (Re‑introducing light cognitive load as recovery begins aligns with how executive systems rebound after stress.) [frontiersin.org]
ACT, Mindfulness, and Self‑Compassion (Why These Help)
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) uses present‑moment awareness and defusion skills to unhook from sticky thoughts while you take small, values‑aligned steps, ideal for this wobbly in‑between phase. Mindfulness processes in ACT support psychological flexibility (the capacity to feel what you’re feeling and still do what matters).
If your inner critic flares (“Why can’t I just focus?”), a dose of self‑compassion lowers friction so recovery can happen.
When to Reach Out
If fogginess persists for several weeks, significantly disrupts functioning, or comes with rising anxiety, low mood, or sleep disruption, it’s a good time to check in with a clinician. Therapy offers a steady place to make sense of what your body has been through and to rebuild routine safely.
You’re not broken. Your nervous system is doing exactly what it was designed to do: protect, then recover.
Useful Links
- Stress response & chronic activation: Harvard Health overview of fight‑or‑flight and downstream impacts. [health.harvard.edu]
- Allostatic load (wear‑and‑tear of stress): Verywell Mind medical review; Medical News Today overview; systematic review (Psychotherapy & Psychosomatics). [verywellmind.com], [medicalnewstoday.com], [jstor.org]
- Prefrontal cortex & stress‑related cognitive dips: Frontiers in Human Neuroscience mini‑review. [frontiersin.org]
- Grounding & present‑moment skills: PositivePsychology.com guide; PMR/grounding evidence summary; ACT “drop anchor” (Russ Harris). [positiveps…hology.com], [counsellin…ection.com], [actmindfully.com.au]
- Exhale‑longer breath & vagal activation: Scientific Reports (Nature) study; Psychology Today review of rVNS. [nature.com], [psychologytoday.com]
